I've gained another daughter and the little girl I've been doting on in this blog seems to have turned into a little lady who's devastatingly far from the girl eating Noodles with her Daddy.
Where the hell has the time gone? A question I am destined to ask for years to come it would seem. Still doesn't make it any less pressing.
And when did I become that father? The one that has a ton of pictures of the first child but just "never found the time" to post anything about his second? Sad. I think its only fitting that I resurrect this thing just long enough to post some thoughts about Rio that will depress the hell out of me when she's 3.
But first, Rowan. Always the first and forever my teacher on Fatherhood and of life lived no longer just for me. She's been a good instructor over the last two years and I think the lessons have stuck. This little girl with her vast imagination and words that stretch beyond her years. And that face. That face! So much expression and openness. I wake up at night in fear that today will be the day someone teaches her to be cautious and guarded. Our first foray to pre-school had me wishing I had brought some sort of shield to block the inevitable barbs carelessly thrown from other toddlers.
Her sad face when she told me she wasn't good at basketball tore my heart in two. Who told her that? How the hell do they know? Does it matter? Not to Rowan anymore. But it sticks with me; that brush with maturity. That dreaded doorway to adulthood and peer interaction got a few feet closer. We just managed to escape unscathed. At least she did. As for me, I keep looking over my shoulder.
The classic Father posture. Looking over the shoulder wondering where the hell the time went. And when did I become that father?
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